The 3 Beliefs to Master Change

The 3 Beliefs to Master Change

Business Leadership Lifestyle Personal Growth self development

Have you ever felt like you’re between a rock and a hard place?  Like you don’t have any options and you’re stuck?  We can feel frustrated and powerless in the place.  And my suggestion to you is that there are ALWAYS options when you have the 3 beliefs to master change.

1.  I can create my experience.  Every moment of every day we perceive the world around us as a reflection of what’s going on in our psyche. In other words, who we are at the core impacts how we experience the world.  So if you want to change your experience, change your Self.  Do the work – whether it’s personal growth, spiritual, or professional development – do the work to transform yourself, in order to change your experience of life.  I worked with a woman who had a challenging relationship with her father in her family-based business.  While in my office that day, she transformed her perspective and understanding of that relationship, and that was the day her relationship with her dad changed for good.  Do the inner work, to create a better life experience.

2.  I can choose how I respond. With every experience, we have a choice how we respond, but first we must believe we have that choice. A very wise man once said to me “No one can make you feel anything!!” This can be a difficult pill for some to swallow because it’s human nature to blame those around us for how we’re feeling.  You get to choose your feelings by choosing your thoughts, beliefs, and physiology… unless you want to continue to give away your power and not take responsibility for your life.  Choose your response (consciously) or react (unconsciously). The choice is yours.

3.  I can handle whatever comes my way. …and I will be ok. This belief is at the heart of empowerment and resilience. Every time I learn a skill, I’m empowered. Every time I adapt to a new circumstance, I’m resilient. Every time I lean on my network for support, or tap a new resource, or resolve an old pain, I’m strengthening my foundation and increasing my flexibility.  The more you stretch and grow and flex, the better able to handle unexpected events you become.  Think of it like building a muscle. You build muscle by working it regularly in a cyclic pattern of stretch-and-heal. Stretch into the new every day, and you’ll be better able to handle whatever comes your way!

I’d love your feedback! And don’t forget to leave a link back to your own blog too if you have one via the commentluv feature here on the site.

Until next time,

Sue

 

3 Reasons Why People Stay Busy – The Busy Syndrome

3 Reasons Why People Stay Busy – The Busy Syndrome

Business Leadership Personal Growth self development

We’re heading into our busiest time of year, the holiday season, and yet, don’t you find that it’s busy all year long?!  As the commercials recently are saying, Is that good busy? Or not so good busy?  I’ve noticed some interesting things we do and say that are completely counter to what we truly want…something I call the ‘busy syndrome’. “Hi, how are you?” “Oh, I’m SO busy!” <smile>  (as if that’s a good thing) Sometimes it is a good thing, and, often it’s not.  What are your life balance goals?  What are your work or business goals?  Do they include being busy every waking hour? Is it your desire to be booked up with work, volunteer, and family commitments every day and most evenings? Who wants that? Yet, most of you have built your lives this way.  Why? Continue reading

Are You Hiding Your Truth?

Are You Hiding Your Truth?

Business Leadership Personal Growth self development

We human beings are notorious for skirting around the truth.  We are so concerned with ‘keeping the peace’ and wanting everyone to like us, that we completely give away our personal power by hiding our truth.

“I want to know if you can disappoint another to be true to yourself?” 

Oriah Mountain Dreamer, The Invitation

Because if we can’t live our truth then what are we living?  Someone else’s expectations.  Our own “shoulds”.  Society’s drone norms.

You are meant to live your truth.  In its highest form. Which will be constantly evolving as you expand.

When you live your truth, you must also speak it.  And that truth may not be popular. It may not be pretty or neat or easy to swallow.

Continue reading

Our Most Powerful Hidden Asset – The Unconscious Mind

Our Most Powerful Hidden Asset – The Unconscious Mind

Business Leadership Personal Growth self development

Have you heard that you have an unconscious mind? I teach my clients how to utilize the most powerful hidden asset that we have… the unconscious mind.  It is responsible for our actions and behaviour, and takes care of our body’s autonomic functions while we focus on other things. In fact, this best-kept-secret-to-getting-the-results-you-want is the single biggest factor in driving the results you get in your life.  So when clients come to me stuck in their stuff, missing the mark, and repeating old patterns, I tell them to “Use your mind… not that mind, the other mind!”

The unconscious mind makes up 90% of your mind’s capacity!  And it drives your behaviour!

Your Conscious Mind is the goal-setter and

your Unconscious Mind is the goal-getter

Wouldn’t it be useful to know how to leverage this part of your mind so you can get the results you really want?

Continue reading

5 Ways to Know that You Don’t Need a Coach

5 Ways to Know that You Don’t Need a Coach

Business Leadership Personal Growth self development

Do you ever wonder if you need a coach? I thought it might be simpler to share 5 ways to know that you don’t need a coach rather than all the reasons why you might need one.  You see…

I often get asked “What is it that you do exactly?”

And my typical response;

“I work with mission-focused conscious leaders to strengthen their personal foundation through mental and emotional resilience, so they can make a bigger impact in the world and navigate uncertainty with joy, purpose and grace.”

… is sometimes met with the question, “How do I know if I need that?”

Continue reading

3 Principles to Help Increase Your Bouncebackability

3 Principles to Help Increase Your Bouncebackability

Business Leadership Personal Growth self development

Yes, it seems that the world is going to hell in a hand basket. And – we don’t have to go crazy along with it!  With change occurring faster around us, and the frequency and intensity of unexpected events increasing, we’ve never before needed to be able to bounce back more quickly than we do now.  So, here are the 3 principles of bouncebackability to get you on your feet faster after a setback:

  1. Change the way you think about failure or crisis.  Our society raises us to believe that failure is a very bad thing; that it should be avoided at all cost, lest we be ridiculed and ostracized.  And yet there are so many examples of famous people who failed so very many times but we only hear about the eventual success they had.  It was said that Thomas Edison failed more than 1000 times while inventing the light bulb, and to this he commented, “I have not failed 1,000 times. I have successfully discovered 1,000 ways to NOT make a light bulb.” The key here is that failure is learning, and what a wonderful thing!  The same is true of crisis.  The universe doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle.  And this experience, no matter how frenzied and chaotic, presents massive learning for you, if you choose to see it.
  2. Manage your emotions.  It’s important to know that it is normal to feel negative emotions with a setback, and with the right emotional processing system, you can move through those emotions quickly and effectively to get to rebound. The system we teach in the Rock-Solid Foundation program is simple.  Notice it, feel it, express it, learn from it and move on. You get to have your emotions.  It’s a basic human right. Use your emotions wisely.
  3. Get the learning. I have already alluded to this in the first two points, and I can’t stress it enough. The fastest way to move yourself through a setback is to get the learning from it.  Every experience we have gives us learning, and our emotions are the guidance system to what the learning might be.  If we feel angry, then there is a boundary to be set or a corrective measure to be taken, for example.

It’s humanly impossible to go through life without setbacks, so why do we set this unrealistic standard for ourselves?

I challenge you to embrace the setbacks, challenges and failures and use your emotional guidance systems to acquire the learning.  Happy bouncing!

Share your thoughts with me right here on the blog. Don’t forget to leave a link back to your own blog too if you have one via the commentluv feature here on the site.

Until next time, be resilient.

Sue

 

What Kind of Power do you Hunger For? Part 1

What Kind of Power do you Hunger For? Part 1

Business Leadership Personal Growth self development

Power is such a fascinating thing.  Most of us are familiar with the hunger for external power in the world, which is acquired using influence, authority, rewards and consequences.  This type of power over another is used as a means of control, and more often than we’d like to admit, with manipulation and fear.  This power-over model can be abused and misused, stifling those who are under the influence of the person using the power-over strategies.

Another type of power is personal power: the strength and confidence to stand up for yourself and for something you believe in, the clarity of purpose of your impact in the world, and the freedom to be more fully who you really are. Personal power gives you the feeling that you are in charge of your actions and your life, and that you have the power to create the changes you want to see.

Notice that power-over is only in relation to another; it does not exist without the other.  Whereas personal power exists independently of others… as empowerment.

How would you like to be able to feel more empowered, deliberately, immediately with just a few small actions?

Would it be useful to you to be able to reverse the draining dynamics between you and others you find challenging to deal with in your life?

All of this and more is possible when you follow these life-changing secrets to reclaiming your personal power:  Know what you want and what you stand for, take responsibility for your results, get your needs met and keep your energy reservoir overflowing, and set personal boundaries.

Where do you feel most challenged in claiming your personal power?

Read Part 2 of this blog where we take a look at the key signs that you’re giving your power away.

 

Until next time,

Sue

 

What is Neuroleadership?

What is Neuroleadership?

Leadership Personal Growth self development

What do you get when you apply the latest in neuroscience to the practice of leadership?… Neuroleadership of course!

Our understanding of how the brain works has advanced so much and traditional leadership schools have failed to keep up. We now know how to uncover the unconscious patterns that are driving behaviour. And since our behaviour determines our results, we now have the ability to make changes in the patterns and programs that are running outside of our awareness, so that the new desired behaviour is created instantly and sustainably.

Neuroleadership involves advanced communication techniques using intentional language tools and leading edge non-verbal cues.  Neuroleadership also includes methods for controlling our emotional state so that as a leader, we can self-manage no matter how challenging the situation.

In neuroleadership we elicit a leader’s values, beliefs and metaprograms – the three most unconscious of our unconscious programs – so that we can determine where the programs are going awry and change them to achieve the desired results. Neuroleaders benefit from the revolutionary programming techniques using submodalities to eliminate an unwanted behaviour, rewire a limiting belief into an empowering one, take the charge off a deep fear, and amplify and install a goal.

Understanding how the brain works to produce results, the principles of neuroleadership ensure desired outcomes are achieved.  Neuroleaders make decisions quickly because it takes 10x more energy to sit on the fence and “decide not to decide”. Leaders calibrate on specific negative and positive emotions in order to decide to go for it.  In neuroleadership, leaders are relentless in their focus on what they want, because they know that focusing their 90,000 thoughts a day produces results. They commit to a goal by taking action, meaning they invest time, money and energy.  And last but not least, in neuroleadership leaders know that failure equals learning and they celebrate a setback, then refocus on the goal and choose to do it differently.  They do this by installing a recovery strategy at the unconscious level that allows them to bounce back quickly, an critical resilience trait in these unpredictable times.

The result? By accessing the 90% of our brain that is normally operating outside of awareness, leaders can leverage the latest science in how the brain works, to ensure their leadership programming is running, rather than their old default survival programming.

I’d love your feedback! Don’t forget to leave a link back to your own blog too if you have one, via the commentluv feature you’ll find here on the site.

Until next time,

Sue

 

 

3rd Requisite for Change: Taking Action!

3rd Requisite for Change: Taking Action!

Personal Growth self development

All too often we get swept up in the daydreaming and envisioning of our big goals and then either become overwhelmed at the enormity of the gap between where are now and where we want to be, or… we simply get caught up in the daily busyness and never get around to actioning that next step!  And so, taking action is the 3rd requisite of change, after Focusing on What You Want and Clearing out the Unresolved Past.  Once we’re clear on what we want and are focusing on it, and our old limiting beliefs and inner conflicts are eliminated, there’s nothing left to do except put one foot in front of the other to move toward our goal.  And yet, sometimes we don’t.

Frank was burning the candle at both ends…  He had been working on an entrepreneurial business idea for well over a year.  He had spent countless hours in research and interviews and had met with a number of potential investment partners, two of whom were strong partner material.  However, Frank had neither registered or incorporated a business, entered into a legal partnership, or acquired a lease on the ideal location that he had found months earlier. While consumed with this venture, Frank was working full time as a Senior Manager at a manufacturing company.  Frank had invested time and energy but no money, and his project was going nowhere.

Until we take action, we haven’t fully committed to our goal, and without commitment, it won’t happen.  Action requires spending time, money and energy in some combination (although not necessarily equally) to get closer to the desired outcome.  Committing resources toward our goal says we’re serious and says we’re in with both feet, so until we do, it’s a wish, not a goal.

What do we do when we don’t know what the first step is?  Turn around and do the moon walk!  We backcast from the end goal, to identify each of the steps needed until we arrive back at Now.  The first step is then clear. It’s SO much easier to ask ourselves, “What do I need to do right before I get here?” than it is to ask “What’s the first thing I need to do to get way over there?”

Another way that we can also take action is to set and enforce our Boundaries.  Boundaries are the physical, emotional and mental limits we establish to protect ourselves from others.  Whenever we feel manipulated, disrespected, drained or that we’re giving away our power, a Personal Boundary needs to be set.  Stay tuned for more on How to Set Boundaries in a later post!

I’d love your feedback! And, don’t forget to leave a link back to your own blog via the commentluv feature here on my site.

Until next time,

Sue

 

 

Clearing Out Your Unresolved Past: The 2nd Requisite for Change

Clearing Out Your Unresolved Past: The 2nd Requisite for Change

Leadership Personal Growth

Have you ever noticed how the tiniest little thing will sometimes cause you to overreact? Or have you ever become aware of a belief that you’ve held since childhood, that is not serving your highest good?  These are examples of unresolved past issues that are conflicting with your ability to become and achieve all that you want.  As discussed in The 1st Requisite for Change, we first have to get crystal clear about what it is that we want, in order to successfully create change. Negative emotions have a purpose – they are telling us that something needs our attention.  In the present moment this is very useful.  When I notice that I’m feeling irritated, or mad, this feeling is a signal to me that proper boundaries need to be maintained or rebuilt. When we feel anger, we need to ask ourselves, “What must be protected or restored?”. Often, though, we can feel a strong negative emotion that is unwarranted or inappropriate for the situation.  In this case, we’re being triggered by unresolved emotions from the past.  The Unconscious Mind holds on to emotions from past events because there’s still something to learn that wasn’t learned at the time.  This is our emotional baggage… every time we didn’t get the message or the learning from the emotion, the unresolved emotion went into our bag that we carry around with us day in and day out. We also carry limiting beliefs in our baggage.  Like “I can’t _________ (you fill in the blank). When did you decide to believe that? Remember the time when your mean older sister told you at age 6 that you couldn’t sing and so you decided to believe that and never uttered another note again!  These Limiting Decisions are also stored in the Unconscious Mind and directly affect our behaviour and of course our results. The Unconscious Mind will gladly release the limiting decisions and the unresolved emotions when we go back to get the learning from these past events. But guess what?! You don’t need to wallow in the emotion of that past event to process the learning!  In fact, when we use Time Line Therapy® techniques to remove past negative emotions and limiting decisions, the experience is essentially content-free.  And it’s fast! We release Anger, Sadness, Fear, Hurt and Guilt and several limiting decisions in about 45 minutes.  This process is included in the Personal Leadership Breakthrough program. Resolving the inner conflicts from the past is the 2nd Requisite for Change.  Without removing limiting decisions and unresolved negative emotions, we are hindering our ability to create the changes that we want for ourselves.  Post a comment on your experiences with clearing out your unresolved past!